僕は元気です

November 18th, 2008

最近Buono!の曲にはまっていますが、”別に今更アイドルに夢中になっても...”、とは思っていますけど、やっぱり歌詞もメロディも明るくて良く聞きます。そのなかに“ビビるなあたし!”って歌う部分があります。それが何か今の僕に元気を出さそうです。

えと、一歩先も真黒で何も決められていませんが、それでもまだ続いています。それが何かとは分かりませんが、とにかく僕は大丈夫です。元気にしているし、ご心配しないでください。

あ、そういえば、“ハチミツとクローバー”、知っていらっしゃいますか? 映画でもありますが、僕はまだ漫画版しか読んでいません。その全10冊ボックスセットを本屋で見つけました。なんと、帰る道に築けたら手に持っていました。買っちゃったのかい...

最近失望しました。ミスチルの”Tomorrow Never Knows”って言う曲なんですけど、かなり有名なので御存知の方も結構あると思いますが、その歌詞の話です。コーラスの歌詞で、“誰も知る事ない明日へ”と言う部分を、僕は今まですっかり間違っていました。それを何故か“誰も死ぬ事ない明日へ”と思ったんです。それで、“なんと美しい言葉だろう”と思っていましたが、なんか今日歌詞を読みながら今まで裏切っていた気がしました。もちろん僕の間違いですけど...それにしても、誰も死ぬ事ない明日って、すごいと思いませんか?

写真は栄光の“ハチミツとクローバー”です。サントラの“ハチミツ”はあのスピッツの曲です。かなり名曲なので機会ができればぜひチェックしてください。

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let me keep it short

November 18th, 2008

dear everyone,

please don’t worry.

War, Weapons, Military, and Everything Negative but Unavoidable

October 15th, 2008

I am now used to hear the question after I say that I am from Korea. “Have you done the military service?” Considering the long, tragic history of the divided country, I guess that might be a natural response of everyone. Yes, the military has became one of the cores that compose this country.

A law student named Eui-Seok Kang has headlined Korean media these days. He did a performance to stop the marching tanks celebrating the Day of Korean Military. He, completely naked, jumped into the middle of the marching parade of tanks. He urges that we do not need any military force but peace. He is saying that “there cannot be any war in this world if everyone chooses not to serve in any military.” He also admits that his idea is Utopian, but he addes that a change always follows the ideal.

I cannot argue against his statement of our responsibility to create positive changes in society to make the idea into reality. However, I have to question before I can say that I completely agree to his idea. Will there be, really, no war after all, if all of us chooses not to have military?

I guess I am not smart as he is, so I cannot see the simple logic he suggests.  Let me ask a question, though may seem irrelevant: why do we need law? If all of us are so smart to choose peace rather than destructive battle that will eventually kill ourselves, aren’t we smart enough to avoid conflicts and cooperate with everyone in the society? If then, aren’t we intelligent enough to follow ethics, the justice we crave for, and eventually to the ideal?

Let us see what is going on in this society. We are creating another law everyday just to protect us (and possibly to manipulate others); this is happening not because there is no ethics or justice. I speak of the ethics, you long for the justice, and we are all taking a step toward the ideal. We need law because we cannot trust each other. A person, innately full of desires to take the best, “might” violate others’ act to fulfill such desires as well. I should not define a human being as selfish or innately evil, but I am at least sure that most of us would agree to the statement that a human being always extracts, or attempts to do so, the best out of its surroundings. We need a physical restraint to keep every members of the society in control. We voluntarily gave up our freedom to insure our safety. The freedom is the cost we pay.

Kang stressed that 51% of the annual budget of the United States is spent for military. With the statistics, he wrote that we can feed a half million starving children three meals a day. Sadly enough, that is the cost we chose to pay to insure our ‘own’ safety. Countless bodies fall everyday, and the dollars flow into the fatty belly of weapon merchants and politicians. We all do know the fact, but we chose to pay the cost. We are just people; we care more of ourselves, our family, our friends, or our relatives. Maybe a million people would starve to die somewhere thousands miles away; we know it is not just, but we would still choose to save a thousand people right here than the million out there. That’s just human nature.

Yes, it would be a far-better world if all of us choose to throw weapons away and take a step together. But what if I disarmed, but the guy living next door hid a knife? What if our country disbanded its military, but the country out there kept a missile? This endless roop of ‘what if’ questions, the perpetual suspect, is the reason why we still have war, weapons, the military, and everything negative but unavoidable. I wish we could trust each other, being naked but not afraid to greet each other with kiss. Unfortunately, we chose to pay the cost.

Despite

October 15th, 2008

I am trying to write something here, I would say at least three times a day, but none of such attempt results. My central nervous system refuses to untie the yarn of thoughts stuck somewhere inside my head.

the sunset fell and the sea cried

October 6th, 2008

with the tears of the sea
the sunset fell upon the beach
like it would do if I could see
the trace of your feet that leaves

the hope you gave me
has gone to past with the
echos of my scream split
into the stream of tear

at the end of the road we walked on
only the memory would rest upon
and I am here holding on
to
the last possibility we shared

although I knew the day would come
it was still me couldn’t calm
And now I have to face,
though miserably, the twisted fate

that is,
your memory fades away as time goes by
my heart stops crying as the pain goes by
now the days we had wouldn’t hurt me
now both you and I become apart to be

alone, when our hearts still beat

I’m not complaining about this
I’m just saying I don’t miss
but I just think about his
new girlfriend with bliss

’cause I don’t belong there.



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Don’t get this wrong. I just happened to hear a line that goes like, “the sunset fell and the sea cried.” I don’t know why, but I started to imagine from the single line that attracted me to spend half an hour on this poem. I, as an amateur psychology major & a former student of an acting class, used all my imagination to be a girl who broke up with her ex-boyfriend. By the way, it was so awkward for me to just type the word “ex-boyfriend.” I made typos for three times that I had to delete the word and re-type it.. I guess my brain is so male-lized that I can’t even type the word ‘boyfriend.’